I can’t sleep anymore, at least not well. I can’t remember when I had a full night of sleep, or at least more than two hours of good sleep, where I didn’t wake up every five minutes. And I’m sad again, and I can feel it everywhere. I’m sad about everything. When I wake up, when I’m in the car, when I’m playing the piano, and also when I go to History and English. I’m most sad during lunch. I’m just not happy. And I can’t help it. And it’s probably time to call my dad.
Everything feels like it’s falling apart, and I can’t do anything to stop it. I don’t want to be sad anymore but I can’t help it. I don’t get excited over anything anymore.
Life wasn’t supposed to be like this. I don’t want this anymore. I don’t want to live like this anymore. I’m not myself anymore. I haven’t been myself in a long, long time.